Goose, Gander, Goslings

For quite some time, 
the goose was on the loose 
in the bay across the way.

The situation called for investigation.

"Well, what's going on here?"

As the kayak-borne investigator moved in for a gander,
the gander charged, squawking threateningly.
A few paddle-generated splashes slowed his approach.

Circling the kayak, he let his displeasure be known with a tongue-out stare,
the goose equivalent of certain human hand gestures.

After careful consideration, the gander realized
that the buffoon in the kayak was not much of a threat,
and adopted a policy of peaceful coexistence.

Photos of the nest were tolerated.

Look closely to see mama looking back.

Soon the photo session was over,
and the gander went back to sentry duty.

That night, a great cacophony rose up from the bay.  Unseen, there was a crescendo of goose and gander yowling and caterwauling until sudden silence.

The next day, there were no geese to be found.
The nest was empty.

It appeared that someone had enjoyed a raw omelette.

It could well have been this guy,
captured on a neighbor's security camera*.

Though he enjoyed the porch,
he didn't knock.

Although one family did not flourish, there are others.  There will be no shortage of new geese to grease our lawns.  

What do you call a group of resting goslings?

A fuzzy pile.

"Really, Mom?  We have to get up and go?"

And off they went.

On another fine family outing.

*Thanks to Roger A. for providing barely acceptable images.

Paddling the Shallows

After exploring the Stewarts Landing channel adjacent to our camp and connected lakes for the 5th time, a friend once said, "You know, I really enjoy paddling here, but it begins to become monotonous."

Even with admitted bias, I disagree.  Every voyage is one of discovery.  No two treks are quite the same.  And it's not just that the waterscape changes with the seasons as the cycle of plant life changes, and different migratory birds appear.  It's much more that with eyes open, one notices something new, every time.

This is particularly apparent in the shallows, where only human powered craft may go.

Swamp flowers are quite beautiful,
but easily overlooked.

Who is watching whom?

The fleet of female hooded mergansers don't care if it rains.
They are ducks, after all.
For humans, paddling under a poncho is quite peaceful.

Having no poncho, the loon shakes off the rain.
Unlikely.
Shaking off water seems unnecessary for one constantly diving.
Much more likely that he or she is just stretching.

On an unusually sunny day,
the loon's band of teal is evident,
along with streams of droplets
from the most recent dive.

The geese are forever leaving their calling cards.

Here is one calling-card-leaver
checking out the passing common merganser.
"What are you doing on Goose Turf?"

Striped shoots escape submergence.

The shallows provide one of the better
rock and mountain perspectives.

The distinctive male Red-winged Blackbird poses amidst the leatherleaf blossoms.
"Females, on the other hand, are drab, mutely colored creatures"
according to a Smithsonian.com article.

An unfair characterization, don't you think?

Eggs on a rock just under the surface.
There was no label attributing them to a particular critter,
but they could be nascent frogs.

No one would be so crude as to not put their detritus in the proper receptacle.
However, sometimes it blows off the deck accidentally.
Those visiting the shallows have ample opportunity to remove it for disposal,
or to add to one's personal collection.

Thus ensuring that the cattails
will be observed without inorganic distraction.

No Photos! (And good health)

A letter arrived, saying, “It’s time for your colonoscopy!”  The way it was worded, it seemed very much like, “It’s time to go to the amusement park!”  Even though it was unlikely any amusement would be directed my way, the appointment was made, and the prescription was issued.  Hey, occasionally one needs to endure aggravation for the sake of better health, right?

At the pharmacy, the $129 kit appeared on the counter.  “Huh?” I blurted. “The last time I had this done, it was about ten dollars of over the counter stuff.  Is this kit guaranteed to give me a healthy colon?”

“No sir.  Would you like the less expensive and marginally more painful option?”

“Well, how are you measuring painfulness?  One hundred dollars more painful?”

“I’ll get you the low cost option.”

Regardless of the cost of the prep, the drill was the same.  Don’t eat anything and stay within a 4 second run of the toilet.  Be at the hospital in the morning.

Of course, the procedure was great fun.  Routine check behind me, I forgot all about it.

Until six months later, when the Colonoscopy Bill arrived.  It provided pertinent facts.

Responsible Party - John R Fredlund

Patient ID# - 1234567    Excellus Member ID - VYU M911911911 (Because I’m old, I had the pleasure of changing to Medicare in April of 2018)

Statement Date - 7/10/2018    Due Date - 8/7/18

Payment Due $565.28

Aren’t routine procedures covered?  It was time for a phone call. Or two.  After hanging up dissatisfied, it became time to draft a letter to the hospital.

Dear Sirs,

Upon receiving this bill, I was unable to understand the charges.

Customer service (6-AUG-18) for both Rochester Regional Health and Excellus was contacted to try to determine the reason for the charges for a routine colonoscopy.  As the result of these calls, I learned that during the procedure, when I wasn’t paying full attention, and sometime after the good Doctor informed me that I had a nice young-looking anus, he determined that there were abnormalities that deserved further investigation.  Thus at this point, what I thought was to be a routine preventive colonoscopy changed to become a diagnostic procedure.

This may be somewhat plausible, though it minimizes the definition of "preventive."  It appears that the preventive procedure is free as long as it really doesn’t need to prevent anything.  Even so, it makes sense that the Doctor would augment the procedure without my knowledge to provide the best care possible.  To disagree would confirm the doctor’s previous observation on a less literal basis. That there might be additional charges due to the diagnostic augmentation is understood, if not fully embraced.

So a little over 6 months after the procedure, a bill is generated stating that payment is due in less than 30 days.  Surprise! Though the timing and subsequent deadline is not exactly equitable, this is not the subject of this communication.

What I wish to know is how the $565.28 figure was calculated.  By looking at the bill from Rochester Regional Health, it is impossible to tell, even with the 10 lines of itemization.  I am unable to make any combination of the numbers tally to $565.28.

Can you please let me know how this number was determined?  Neither the Rochester Regional Health support person or the Excellus support person was able to tell me.

The issue is not that the bill should be paid.  The issue is that determination of the amount is not transparent.  It is difficult to put pen to check for an amount that appears arbitrary.  Currently, I envision an employee with a tall conical cap and long robe waving a magic wand over his monitor to make a number rise from the bubbling pot beside him.

Can you provide figures that will dispel this image?

Thank you for your help.  I look forward to your reply.

John Fredlund

Weeks later, I received a call from the hospital.  Essentially, the voicemail said, “We have no idea how they came up with that number.  Call the Insurance company.”

As instructed, the call was placed and another conversation ensued which supported the notion that for this and probably many other colonoscopies, they had pulled the uncovered amount out of their asses.

But another call yielded slightly better results.  The new bill received, though still less than satisfactory, was much closer to answering my questions.  I even received an email with somewhat less cryptic line items.

After one more call with the intent of understanding the descriptions of more granular charges, I realized that further investigation would very likely result in little benefit and also much additional aggravation. So I paid the bill.

Why?  Because further combat with the healthcare industry was likely to negatively affect my health.

And yes, that was the actual letter, and thankfully, the tests were negative.